Attractive labor-free eggs and zero carbs.

It’s Tuesday afternoon in Howdygramland. Sam is at work, a load of underwear is dancing in the dryer and sometime this afternoon I’ll bake my first loaf of low-carb banana bread because my new nonstick pan just arrived from Amazon.com. Holy crap. Is this exciting, or what?

I might also bake rye bread today for Sam. He loves rye bread, and I’m feeling especially generous and kind-hearted this afternoon. (Translation: I don’t really have anything else to do except fold underwear.)

From our Two Slugs in Residence department, Sam and I enjoyed a first-rate movie this morning about the Russian revolution: Knight Without Armor (1937) starring Marlene Dietrich and Robert Donat as a pair of refugees eating stale bread and running through the woods in stolen coats. She’s actually an escaped countess with perfect makeup hiding from the Bolsheviks and he’s an officer for the other side; after they fall in love, everybody ends up being the enemy. This was definitely all very well done, and the fact that Sam managed to stay awake for the entire film should be testimonial enough.

Breaking news! I just ordered myself a couple of extra sorter bags for my awesome Seville Classics rolling laundry cart. A girl can never have too many sorter bags! Seville Classics makes the best laundry crapola on earth and prices on their own website are even lower than Amazon’s. The Howdygram thinks you should buy something from them.

Incidentally, tomorrow’s biweekly and unusually huge delivery from Schwan’s will include an old favorite (Quick-Bake French Fries) and something I’m trying for the very first time: Garden Vegetable Omelets. You get six in a box for about $10 — with cheese! — and they nuke in only 90 seconds. As a lazy senior with diabetes and a variety of mobility issues, this product promises attractive labor-free eggs, a hot meal and zero carbs. Definitely a win-win if they’re actually edible. (Stay tuned.)

And now, alas, it’s time to empty the dishwasher, continue my laundering activities and preheat the oven for banana bread. Don’t be jealous. Thank you.