Everything in the news is pretty disgusting these days. We’ve got hysteria in the Middle East, royal titties on magazine covers across the globe, Twinkies going bankrupt and fringe nutjobs like Paul Ryan calling President Obama “an extremist.” That being said, the only articles I allowed myself to read online this morning were Dear Abby and a photo retrospective of Florence Henderson’s hairstyles from “The Brady Bunch.”
L’shana tovah, everybody! Sam and I ushered in the first night of Rosh Hashanah with a pot of Jewish chili and two crappy films: 1)
Along Came a Spider (1970) starring Suzanne Pleshette and a lot of orange furniture; and 2)
The Wasp Woman (1959) directed by shlockmeister Roger Corman and featuring Susan Cabot plus a lot of other people nobody ever heard of.
Please allow me to swing off on a screwball tangent for a minute to discuss the aforementioned Susan Cabot, whose actual life and death were stranger than anything Roger Corman dished out in his drecky horror movies. Apparently Cabot’s son was a dwarf named Timothy Scott Roman who, following years of emotional abuse, bludgeoned mom to death with a barbell in 1986 while she slept. At trial the court found him mostly nuts due to taking an experimental growth hormone for 15 years that didn’t work, and teeny Tim wound up with three years of probation and a cash fine more appropriate for a speeding violation. In addition
— here’s the best part — Cabot apparently had a torrid love affair with King Hussein of Jordan in 1959 that ended when he found out she was actually Jewish. Cabot’s real name was HARRIET SHAPIRO. Holy crap.
I can hear Sam slamming cabinets in the kitchen so I think I’ll go join the fun. Thank you for reading this.
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