With only 37 shopping days left until my birthday I ought to let you know that a classy new set of wheels is at the top of my “wish list” this year. I WANT A ROLLATOR! The kind with a BUILT-IN PADDED SEAT, POWER BRAKES, a CUP HOLDER and a SHLEPPER BASKET for transporting crap around the house. My favorite must-have accessory is a 120-decibel AIR HORN to get slugs, small children and old people the hell out of my way. The air horn is available online from
Deal Extreme for about $13 with free shipping.
On my agenda this week? I want to join one of Mesquite’s Senior Centers so I won’t turn into an antisocial hermit. According to their latest newsletter, September activities at our three local Senior Centers include: 1) Friday night bluegrass music with cookies; 2) a supervised weekly shopping trip to Wal-Mart; 3) the annual “Being Young” Fair featuring Buck and Gloria’s rock & roll sing-along, free popcorn and bingo; 4) board game night; 5) daily hot lunch for a buck if you’re 60 or older; 6) a monthly happy birthday mixer; 7) craft classes (choice of making earrings with Jerrie or a mummy candy dish with Dorothy); 8) Senior Day Camp with hay rides and hot dogs; 9) flu shots on Thursdays; and 10) this month’s feature film:
Beverly Hills Chihuahua.
The map below indicates: A) Howdygram headquarters; B) the Goodbar Senior Center behind McKinsey Elementary School; C) the Evans Senior Center; and D) the Rutherford Senior Center. Goodbar and Evans offer the cheap lunch program. I’ve got September’s menu if anybody’s interested.
Please stop laughing because I’m serious about this crap. Thank you.
No comments:
Post a Comment