Proof that you don’t need any functioning brain cells to be an Olympic swimmer.

Everybody knows I’m a big fan of “Project Runway,” and last night’s episode finally revealed the three finalists (pictured below) who will show their collections at Fashion Week. I have to admit, I’m underwhelmed this year.

Patricia creates capes with horsehair fringe for Native Americans, Michelle’s designs are all Victorian “steampunk” in dark green (seriously) with quilted leggings and pounds of hardware, and Stanley’s clothes are simply, in a word: GORGEOUS. I’d wear them in a heartbeat, and that’s exactly why he’ll never win: I’M IN MY SIXTIES. I can’t imagine any fashion designer ever hitting the big time if his target customers are senior citizens with corrective shoes and boring underpants. Nevertheless, try to tune in next Thursday night on Lifetime to see who wins. If you care.

And now a little something from the zany world of politics! Jon “Einstein” Lundberg, a Republican State Senator from Tennessee, finally found time to focus his efforts on passing a vital and long-deserved resolution: A resolution honoring himself. The resolution was written by Lundberg’s staff to honor the 20th anniversary of the Senator’s P.R. firm. When asked about spending $300 of the taxpayer’s money on a self-congratulating resolution, Lundberg remarked that he paid back the state of Tennessee for the cost of the paper. (How about also reimbursing taxpayers for this indefensible waste of time?) According to local news station WSMV, this wasn’t Lundberg’s first abuse, because he also passed a resolution honoring his daughter when she graduated from high school. Holy crap.

At last, here’s ample proof that you don’t need any functioning brain cells to be an Olympic swimmer! A pair of anchors on Fox’s Philadelphia morning show dissolve into hysterics after interviewing vacant Ryan Lochte about his upcoming reality TV show, “What Would Ryan Lochte Do?”, which focuses on Ryan partying at Hooters, Ryan getting drunk, Ryan posing without a shirt and Ryan learning how to tie his shoes. 



Lochte’s reality show premiers on Sunday, April 21, at 9 p.m. Central on E! Entertainment. For the record, I think I’d rather watch “What Would Terri Schiavo Do?”.

And now for a welcome diversion from the Boston Marathon bombing, here’s a video of a Russian cat playing with a vacuum cleaner hose. On YouTube it’s titled “Кот и пылесос.” This can probably best be translated as: “In Search of Last Night’s Hairball.”



My Friday night sock-folding party starts in 30 minutes. Thank you for reading this.