Please help me vote these medieval right-wing uterus gods out of office.

While I wait for Sam to get home from Tom Thumb with American cheese and a million cans of seltzer I thought I’d write a quick post about Rick Perry, the dimwit governor of Texas, who’s so obsessed in his fight against abortion that he cut off all state funding for Planned Parenthood. Governor Einstein insists that Texas is entitled to exclude groups “affiliated with abortion providers” from its federally-subsidized Women’s Health Program.

According to the Planned Parenthood Action Fund, the issue here in Texas isn’t really about Planned Parenthood at all ... it’s about the state’s desire to deny critical health services to more than 200,000 women who rely on Planned Parenthood for cancer screenings, birth control and medical exams. A lawsuit by Planned Parenthood is pending; now it’s up to women nationwide to vote these medieval right-wing uterus gods out of office. (This entire conversation makes me want to hurl.) Thank you.

Out of curiosity, did any of you lucky people get to see naked pictures of Prince Harry this morning? Apparently they’re all over the Internet after TMZ posted them online. Harry was partying with other naked nitwits in Las Vegas and wasn’t bright (or sober) enough to make sure somebody confiscated cell phones first. Buckingham Palace is confirming the photos are genuine, and as I write this post Harry (pictured here fully dressed) is on his way home for a chat with grandma. Holy royal crap.

Breaking news! I found out yesterday that all of Mesquite (including Howdygram headquarters) is scheduled for aerial spraying tonight to eradicate the West Nile virus, which is a major public health emergency with more than 400 confirmed cases and 16 deaths in the Dallas area. A few days ago the county health department shpritzed only a teeny section of Mesquite located north of Interstate 30; the rest of us get it tonight around 10 p.m. I might order dinner from China City to celebrate because Mongolian chicken is the answer to damn near EVERYTHING.

Thank y’all for reading this.