Rob Ford is bigger than you and threatens to murder people.

In this post: Poor Toronto, Louie Gohmert rides again, anticipating loot.

I desperately want to write a Howdygram post today but I can’t think of a topic or a clever opening line or even a joke. Therefore, I’ll begin with the following glamour shot portrait of Rob Ford, the alcoholic, crack-smoking mayor of Toronto, Canada, one of North America’s most beautiful cities.

Haunted by the ghosts of carbohydrates past.

In this post: Hypoglycemia, special deliveries, a Putz of the Week, a movie review.

I woke up from a nice, long nap around 4:30 this afternoon and for no valid reason whatsoever discovered that my blood sugar had plummeted to 50. FIFTY! Why the hell would this happen, when I injected a calculated dose of insulin at lunch time? Am I being plagued by demons? Haunted by the ghosts of carbohydrates past?

Seriously, nobody else sells wasabi lip balm.

In this post: Sweets for Sam, great gifts from Archie McFee.

As a quick update to my last post, Sam finally got home this morning at 8:15 after 18 consecutive hours at the office. He was in surprisingly good spirits — the project apparently went well — but holy crap, nobody gets paid enough to work hours like that! Sam slept on and off until 2:30 this afternoon, ate some leftover pizza, showered and went back to work around 3:30. As a bonus the big Halloween surprise I ordered for him on Amazon showed up via FedEx about half an hour before he left ... TWO BAGS OF BRACH’S FALL FLAVORS CARAMEL CANDY CORN. Sugar solves everything.