Although “Men’s Health” magazine already has awarded several Texas towns top honors as America’s drunkest and fattest, we now also have another distinction. Texas is America’s most sex-crazed state. This is based on yet another study that compares nationwide numbers for condom sales, birth rates, sex toy purchases and state health department statistics for STDs, including the ever-popular chlamydia, gonorrhea and syphilis. Of the top ten cities on the list, Austin came in at #1, Dallas is #2, Arlington is #7 and Houston is #10.
This achievement is nothing short of staggering ... especially when you consider that Dallas, in particular, is frequently referred to as “the rhinestone buckle on the Bible belt” and still doesn’t allow liquor sales in most of its neighborhoods ... and never on Sundays even in those that do. But at least we finally know what all those religious yahoos are doing behind closed doors. If nothing else, tourism ought to pick up a little now.
Welcome to Texas, y’all. And thank you for reading this.
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