Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Twas two nights before Christmas ...

... and I’m sitting here in the middle of a thunderstorm eating Voortman’s Sugar-Free Shortbread Swirl cookies.

There are two things wrong with this scenario. First, we’re having damn peculiar weather for late December. It’s supposed to be ICE STORM season, not THUNDERSTORM season. Second, Voortman’s sugar-free cookies taste like drywall and absolutely SUCK. I wouldn’t be in the same room with them if I had any alternatives. (On the plus side, at least they’re cheap.)

In other news, the Howdygram is pleased to report that Richard and Mayumi Heene were both sentenced to jail today for their stupid weather balloon hoax back in October. Law enforcement officials, the media and the general public are still so outraged I’m surprised these idiots weren’t sentenced to the gallows and their children sent to foster homes. However, in a popularity poll they still ranked slightly higher than Tiger Woods. Merry Christmas, y’all.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Had a shortbread swirl last night (not sugar-free) and wasn't overly impressed. We live just a few miles from Voortmans, so we stopped in to their outlet store yesterday. My vote is for the pink wafers, very addicting.
Leah Weinberg

Marcy Marks said...

Hi, Leah! I agree about the Voortman's wafers ... except I like the mock chocolate and peanut butter flavors. Everything else they sell pretty much tastes like drywall. The sugar-free cookie industry is absolutely LAME. When I crave something sweet there's only one thing that does it for me: Russell Stover's sugar-free 60% cacao dark chocolate squares. As a matter of fact, I just sent Sam to the supermarket!