Thursday, August 29, 2013

I’m not on Wal-Mart’s payroll. They couldn’t afford me.

Breaking news: I lost another client today. Victoria called at 3:30 and asked me to take down her website because she’s closing her business, of which I approve wholeheartedly because I’m trying to do the exact same thing with mine. It’s actually satisfying to know I’m not the only one who’s fed up with all the day-to-day crapola. I am, in almost every regard, retired now, evidenced by the fact that my Social Security checks will begin arriving on December 11. THIS IS A VERY HUGE DEAL. Let’s all go out for lunch!

Hey. Anybody need some really nice, really inexpensive bedding? The Howdygram would like to recommend Wal-Mart’s microfiber sheets! We put a new set of ivory on our bed yesterday and we sincerely love them.
The average price for a complete king-size set is about $21.97 ... less than you’d usually spend for a pair of PILLOWCASES! Keep in mind that microfiber sheets are lightweight and thin but they’re also amazingly soft and comfortable, and Sam says they weren’t as cold as our others when he got into bed last night. Personally, I think these things are pretty damn fantastic and just ordered another set in bronze. Here are three links to microfiber sheets on Wal-Mart’s website so you can check them out for yourself.


Yes, I think you should buy a set. Try leopard. (No, I’m not on Wal-Mart’s payroll. They couldn’t afford me.) These would also be nice for Hanukkah presents if you know any Jewish people sleeping on a bare mattress.

I have nothing exciting to write about tonight. Nothing. I don’t feel like railing at right-wing politicians, I’m sick of Miley Cyrus and I have no new medical crises to report. To tell you the truth, other than the aforementioned sheets and a box of AA batteries I haven’t even spent any interesting dough online! Therefore I think I’ll just open a can of something tasty for dinner, start a loaf of low-carb bread in the bread machine and watch “Project Runway.” Thank you very much.

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