My career epiphany.

In case you don’t think you’ll know for sure when the time is right for retirement, here are my top five fundamental clues.

1. You haven’t handed anybody a business card in more than a year.
2. Your clients are a bunch of pests and you’d rather lose the revenue than answer their emails.
3. You’re more excited about the latest episode of “Real Housewives of New Jersey” than quoting a new design project.
4. You seriously can’t remember what your next invoice number is supposed to be.
5. There’s no good reason to continue paying for an 800 number because you haven’t felt motivated to answer the phone since 2009.

I’m not joking about any of this and I’m ready to wrap it all up. I qualify for senior discounts everywhere on the planet, I’ve already collected my pension payout from a former employer, I’m two years away from Social Security and all I really want to do for the next three decades is fold Sam’s socks and defrost things for dinner.

Making matters worse — MUCH worse — is the sad news tonight that Steve Jobs has died, most certainly from the pancreatic cancer he’s been battling for the last few years. Sam called to tell me a few minutes ago and the story is spreading like wildfire on every major news website. Personally, I feel like I’ve lost an old friend. I think I’ll sit shiva here at my Mac for a couple of hours and watch a bunch of Steve’s old MacWorld Expo keynote speeches on YouTube.

Thanks for stopping by.