Thursday, November 7, 2013

Here’s Joan Crawford in “Torch Song” … the “Reefer Madness” of musicals.

In this post: The sponge chronicles, “Mammy Dearest.”

Sam is working late tonight so I decided to kill time by expanding my Subscribe & Save list on Amazon. I just added tasty Hi Lo Vanilla Almond low-carb cereal and a six-pack of Scotch Brite ever-popular scrubby sponges. The blue ones. Last time I tried Scotch Brite’s hipster “Greener Clean” scrubby sponges — the beige ones made from recycled crap — and I hated the damn things because they break apart into annoying little fibers and smell to high heaven.

I think I’ll check out tonight’s episode of “The Daily Show” and wait for Sam to come home. Earlier tonight I entertained myself with an atrocious Joan Crawford train wreck called Torch Song (1953) — the Reefer Madness of musicals — in which she plays the reigning bitch of Broadway, and we’re supposed to believe she’s a singer even though her voice is dubbed by somebody who actually has talent. (Too bad they also couldn’t dub her DANCING.) The high spots? Joan in blackface writhing to a number called “Two-Faced Woman” and Joan throwing a party where the only guests are men. They all look like they’re ready to kill themselves, Joan’s face could scare the Russian army back to Siberia and her apartment looks like a set from “The Twilight Zone.” On the plus side, though, her clothes are great.
Others in the cast include Michael Wilding as Joan’s blind rehearsal pianist (seriously) and Gig Young as her alcoholic boyfriend/lap dog. For your possible interest, here’s Joan in all her Technicolor glory performing the aforementioned blackface number, “Two-Faced Woman.” Be sure to share this with your friends and relatives, okay?

Thanks so much for dropping by. I have to go now.

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