Why do so many maladjusted idiots want to blow up their schools?

I can’t sleep. This time it’s a collection of annoying aches and pains, such as: 1) a stiff neck; 2) neuropathy crap in both feet; 3) my left elbow hurts like hell; and 4) hangnails. Under the circumstances I guess I’ll sit here and stare at my computer monitor until I’m too tired to keep my eyes open. Lucky you!

Weather.com says we’re expecting thunderstorms with heavy rain to roll through here around lunch-time. Believe it or not, I might have to retire my favorite description of their staff meteorologists — i.e., “those lying sacks of poo” — because lately they’re getting a little better at predicting rain. This is the first month in more than two years that we’ve actually had some substantial and accurately-forecast rainfall.

I’m seriously hoping our drought is over. It would sure be swell to water our poor lawns more than once a week again.

Sam and I have a jam-packed agenda of fun on tap at Howdygram headquarters today! As I write this post I’m recording a dozen really old John Wayne movies on the Encore Western channel, all of them simultaneously shitty, awkward and hilarious co-starring Gabby Hayes and the same stupid background music. During his first decade in the business Wayne’s performances were so atrocious that it makes a person wonder how the hell he ever sustained a career in films. Below is an official poster from Randy Rides Alone (1934).

On a more sombre note, I wish somebody would explain to me why so many maladjusted idiots want to blow up their schools. I just read that a 17-year-old boy in Oregon named Grant Acord was arrested with written plans, a checklist and a timeline for a “Columbine-style” attack on West Albany High School that also included pipe bombs, Molotov cocktails, a Drano bomb and a napalm bomb. WTF! Don’t these twisted sociopaths realize that life is not a video game? Back in the 1960s when I got fed up with school I’d cut a couple of afternoon classes with a girlfriend and take a bus to Wrigley Field! Holy crap.

I think I need some pickles & biscuits. Thank you for reading this.