I’d rather buy a new car than Air Jordan sneakers.

It’s a dark, cold and moderately crappy Friday here in the Dallas area, and Weather.com says we’re expecting rain all weekend with temperatures in the mid-30s. Sounds to me like we’re edging dangerously close to that four-letter word I despise so much — snow — but since nobody’s talking about sub-freezing temperatures I refuse to get prematurely hysterical.

While my weekly pot of Sugar-Free Hungarian Un-Stuffed Cabbage is baking in the oven I thought I’d share the following video clip of stampeding Einsteins in Indianapolis, proving once again that the future of our nation lies in the hands of certifiable morons.



These fine citizens are shopping for AIR JORDAN SNEAKERS. Thousands of them had been in line outside overnight, waiting for the mall to open. They’re shown here trampling each other, stomping on children, ripping steel doors off their hinges and fighting with police.

I don’t get it. We make fun of brainwashed North Koreans crying for their “Dear Leader” but it’s okay for Americans to kill each other for canvas shoes that cost as much as a car payment.

Oy. Thank you for reading this.