Looking ahead to the Festival of Lights.

Once again I’m pleased to post my annual Hanukkah Wish List, and y’all will be thrilled to know that you still have plenty of time to shop and ship before the holiday officially ends at sundown on December 28! Please send an email if you need my home address because I wouldn’t want any presents to wind up at somebody else’s house by mistake. Here’s what I want most this year:

• News websites with large-print articles.
• More baby pictures of Sam.
• Cash.
• A giant-size scratching post for humans.
• Trader Joe’s in Mesquite.
• An email moratorium from AARP.
• A 24-hour dim sum delivery service.
• Servants to make sure I always have clean sheets, an empty dishwasher and a walk-in closet that’s organized by season, color and sleeve length.
• A lifetime supply of Coke Zero and Yankee Candle electric air freshener refills (Midnight Jasmine and Lilac Blossoms).

In addition, I’d also like to post this Howdygram photo montage of highly repulsive creeps, jerks and idiots who have no redeeming qualities whatsoever, and if somebody could make them all disappear it would be the greatest Hanukkah present of all time. I would even send you some homemade latkes with a couple of napkins to demonstrate my gratitude.

It’s dark and rainy today in Howdygramland, which is ideal nap weather and I might even hide the phone for a couple of hours. Incidentally, just a reminder that TCM is featuring another night of back-to-back William Powell movies tonight starting at 7 p.m. central time. Titles include a few genuine classics like Life with Father, Mister Roberts and One Way Passage plus a few titles I’ve never seen before. Call me if you make popcorn, okay? We don’t have any.

Thank you for reading this.