No pretzels and the sweaters from hell.

Lucky you … I’m wide awake at 2:30 a.m., posting another intriguing entry to the Howdygram with a nice, tall Marcytini to keep me company. A bowl of pretzels would be swell, too, but we don’t have any in the pantry and I’m way too old for a middle-of-the-night snack run to Wal-Mart. Plus it’s 34° outside. I may be hungry, but I’m not crazy.

And now, something from the Howdygram’s Why It’s Great To Be Jewish department ... classic examples of designer Christmas fashions for goyim. I’d be willing to bet the models posing below also have neon reindeer and inflatable spinning Santas on their front lawns, just like our neighbor across the street.

I should think about going to bed now. Our handyman, Gary, is coming over later today to do a couple of projects for us — such as re-caulking the shower in the master bathroom — and it would be really nice if I didn’t need an afternoon nap because I stayed up all night writing about pretzels, Christmas sweaters and caulk.

Incidentally, there are only 11 more days until Hanukkah, so please stay tuned for my official wish list. Thank you in advance for your generosity.