Shopping, shlepping and carpet dents.

You’re going to see a LOT of me today. The Salvation Army showed up at the crack of dawn — seriously, it was barely 8 a.m. — to haul away our family room furniture, and now there’s really nowhere else for me to hang out except here in the study with you and the Howdygram. Macy’s will deliver our new sectional and chaise tomorrow afternoon.

My number one project in the meantime is to get rid of all the old CARPET DENTS, which offers a perfect segue to the most magical, you-won’t-believe-your-eyes household hint on the planet … MARCY’S SECRET TRICK FOR SUCCESSFUL DENT REMOVAL! Just place a few ice cubes in the dent and let them melt (for however long it takes) at room temperature, then use the tines of an ordinary dinner fork to lift up the flattened carpet fibers.

I’ve been using this technique since the dawn of time (translation: around 1972), and it’s 100% guaranteed to amaze unsuspecting friends and relatives because they’ll NEVER be able to remember where your old furniture used to be! It’s downright SPOOKY!

Also on today’s “do-list” is a junket to Garden Ridge for assorted whatnots … and nobody sells more fantastic whatnots than they do!

There’s a Garden Ridge store barely five minutes from home here in Mesquite. I could lie and tell you that’s why we bought a house here, but you’d figure out that I was just kidding.

Garden Ridge is the size of a Wal-Mart except it’s filled with EXTREMELY CHEAP BUT EXCELLENT HOME DECOR, such as area rugs, throw pillows, pottery, metal art, framed pictures, outdoor furniture and patio goodies, a billion silk plants and trees, kitchen textiles, imitation Tupperware, lamps, sheets, towels, mountains of comforter sets, trunks, genuine plaster busts of Julius Caesar, candles, wonderful smelly potpourri and furniture. I refer you to two photos from their website (below).

This store can be an exhausting experience but I’m willing to give it a shot and shlep around for a couple of hours. Basically, I need something useful to do because there’s zero furniture in the family room so I can’t watch TV. Shopping is good. I figured I’d go around dinner-time when the store isn’t too busy (they’re already advertising holiday hours).

Please stay tuned for a Garden Ridge update later this evening and thank you for reading this.