It’s official. My clients are making me crazy.

I haven’t posted for a couple of days. I know, I know, sue me. I’ve had issues, okay? And in addition to issues, I’ve also been exceptionally preoccupied with all of the following activities.

SAM’S BIRTHDAY AT THE CHOCTAW CASINO. We drove up to Durant, Oklahoma, yesterday and celebrated Sam’s 54th with a trio of TERRIFIC NEW PENNY SLOTS and the lunch buffet that included all of my favorites: pea salad, sugar-free pie and SUGAR-FREE CHEESECAKE! Holy crap! For your possible interest the aforementioned terrific new penny slots are pictured below. We broke even yesterday, which is actually pretty cool for a big day of fun that also included lots of better-than-average food.

ANOTHER LOUSY PLANTAR FASCIITIS FLARE-UP. I had to rent an electric scooter yesterday at the casino because the pain in my right heel was excruciating and I didn’t want to scare people to death crying on my way to the buffet. I’m glad I did this because the overall experience was swell and I never realized how much fun it is to parallel park next to a slot machine.

CONSUMING LARGE QUANTITIES OF CHIA SEEDS. These adorable little things are changing my life! I enjoy a daily pudding made from two cups of Soy Slender soy milk and ¼ cup of chia seeds that poof up and turn into a tasty mucilage (read more). Please try them.

WRESTLING WITH MY WEB DESIGN BUSINESS. It’s official. My clients are making me crazy and I hate ALL of them right now. In an effort to simplify my business and retire by the end of the year, a couple of weeks ago I closed down my overpriced credit card processing account and asked my clients to pay for their website hosting quarterly by check from now on. I’m sad to report that practically nobody remembered to do this (the due date is tomorrow) even though I sent out three semi-friendly reminder emails. I want to whack all of them in the head collectively with my cane.

MY NEW LAMPS ARE HERE. You know, the ones I ordered a few days ago (see earlier post) from Kirklands.com. Sam hasn’t assembled them yet but I plan to start annoying him to death immediately after dinner.

We’re having some deliciously unseasonable weather here in the Dallas area! I’m talking COLD FRONT, people ... 15 degrees below average with temperatures mostly in the upper 80s! This is both awesome and thrilling as hell because we’re usually frying around here by the first of July. Ask anybody. Two years ago we had 70 straight days of 100+ temperatures that began before Memorial Day and killed 15% of the trees in north Texas. And all of those trees are still dead!

More local news! First, professional wrestler “Doink the Clown” died on Friday at a local hospital here in the Dallas area. Police officers said 55-year-old Matt Osborne was taken by ambulance after he was found unconscious inside his apartment in Plano. It’s entirely possible that he scared himself to death. 

Second, the Taco Bell on Broadway Avenue not far from Howdygram headquarters caught fire early Saturday morning. The restaurant was closed at the time and no burritos were injured in the blaze.

Thank you for reading this.