Monday, January 23, 2012

January 23 ... it’s a quadruple-whammy celebration!

I’m sitting here at my desk fully dressed, listening for — go on, take a guess — the GARBAGE TRUCK to drive by. Seriously, I can’t wait to take a nap but first I have to wait for trash pickup so I can run down to the curb and haul the wheelie-can back into the garage because Sam and I are not slobs and never let the can sleep outside overnight. At the moment, however, this anti-slob routine is wrecking my afternoon and cutting into nap-time. The garbage truck is late.

Today is Monday, January 23, and the Howdygram is pleased to announce an exciting QUADRUPLE-WHAMMY CELEBRATION.

Whammy #1. Happy 80th birthday to my adorable mother-in-law, Belle, who’s pictured at right with Sam. They’re spending the day at the Norton Simon Museum in Pasadena because it’s raining and apparently there’s not much else to do except watch “The Price Is Right.”

Whammy #2. Today is CHINESE NEW YEAR and the entire Howdygram editorial staff (actually, just me) would like to wish y’all a deliriously happy Year of the Dragon. Egg foo young for everybody! (If egg foo young is unavailable just shake some soy sauce on your Wheaties.)
Whammy #3. Today is also NATIONAL PIE DAY, an event that deserves to be a legal holiday with a day off work and no mail delivery. Although I can finally celebrate National Pie Day as a diabetic with the three brand new sugar-free graham cracker pie crusts I’ve got sitting in the pantry, I woke up this morning with a critical craving for sugar-free chocolate cake with white frosting.

Yes, friends, I definitely march to a different drummer. I want cake on National Pie Day and matzo balls on Christmas.

Whammy #4. I finally did my grocery shopping this morning at Tom Thumb. It was a thoroughly worthwhile excursion during which I bought everything on my list plus a tub of Blue Bell sugar-free vanilla, SMUCKER’S SUGAR-FREE CARAMEL ICE CREAM SYRUP and — be still, my heart — new PEPPER-JACK CHEEZ-ITS. I’m so excited I want to eat everything at the same time and bake a sugar-free chocolate cake as soon as I’m done.
It was awfully nice of you to stop by today. Next time, call first and I’ll pick up a coffee cake.

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