Thursday, January 30, 2014

Useless, boring, old, retired and unpopular.

In this post: Wanted: emails.

Holy crap. When I got up this morning I HAD NO EMAILS. Nothing. Not even a couple of Democrats begging for dough! My first thought was nuclear war or maybe the Internet had crashed, but no such luck ... I was just unpopular. USELESS, BORING, OLD, RETIRED AND UNPOPULAR! Fortunately, immediately after my extended morning nap I checked again and there were 11 messages in my inbox. And as usual, mostly from Democrats begging for dough with the exception of another sale at Kirkland’s and an invitation to try the weird new Texas Pete buttery cornbread sandwich at Dickey’s Barbecue Pit. (Wow! Bring the kids!)

Sam is working authentic “people hours” this week. You know, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. instead of his usual 2 p.m. until sun-up-the-next-day-when-it’s-time-for-a-shave. Personally, it’s hard for me to adjust to this 9 to 5 crapola because it throws my life off-schedule and I can’t figure out what time of day to eat braunschweiger, take a nap or write a Howdygram post. I’m glad this is only temporary. Thank you.

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