I’m a retired senior citizen now and this is probably all the excitement I can stand.

In this post: Exciting options for retirees, heavy lifting.

It’s 3:45 p.m. and here are my options for the rest of the day: 1) take another nap; 2) eat things; 3) clean up the kitchen because my maid comes tomorrow and I don’t want her to think we’re slobs; 4) items 1, 2 and 3 followed by watching The Thrill of It All (1963) starring Doris Day and James Garner; and 5) folding underwear. If you think my life sounds boring you’d probably be right, except I’M A RETIRED SENIOR CITIZEN NOW and this is probably all the excitement I can stand ... not counting a hot shower and tonight’s season premier of “Hardcore Pawn.”

Hey. Know what? I just found out that all the terrific crap I ordered online yesterday from Wal-Mart is already on the truck for delivery TODAY. This is in addition to the next-day service I’m also getting from Amazon via UPS! Yee-haw! Both deliveries should be here within the next couple of hours but I’m pretty sure I won’t be able to get them inside the house without Sam’s help because a large quantity of canned goods are involved — translation: REALLY HEAVY BOXES — and I’m a pathetic old person who gets dizzy a lot and walks with a cane. I also have carpal tunnel in both hands and my feet hurt. I can continue expanding this kvetch list if you’ve got a little time to kill.

Thank you for stopping by.